The tendency of this or that novelist...may represent suffering as wholly bad in its effects...And, of course, pain, like pleasure, can be so received: all that is given to a creature with free will must be two-edged, not by the nature of the giver or of the gift, but by the nature of the recipient.
- C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain
- C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain
The experiences of infertility and miscarriage have been the hardest, most painful experiences in my life. I'm starting this blog as a place to put all the thoughts that keep me up at night, to help lessen the pain in my chest that no echo-cardiogram or stress test can find reason for, to provide a safe spot for someone else going through these situations, and as a gentle challenge to the Catholic community to become more sensitive and aware of couples carrying this cross.
Unfortunately, I can't promise this blog will be theologically dense or holy. My faith has suffered greatly. Most of the time the only prayer I can muster is, "I do believe; help my unbelief!" (Mark 9: 24)
There have been times when these experiences have tempted me to bitterness. To rage. To envy. It's the fiercest fight of my life to not be all three. How can I accept this pain and experience it as something not "wholly bad in its effects?" How do you do this in your own life?
Please journey with me. Having a companion makes the road much easier.
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